i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
