yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
