we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
