Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
