thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
