You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
