You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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