So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
