I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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