He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
home. puking in laundry basket.
nutella sex= disaster
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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