She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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