i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
No...this little piggys going to the bar
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
