so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
