the day after is always just damage control
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
