My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
