Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
did you just send me my own nude
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
