a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
