i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Blow job season was short but glorious.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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