her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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