she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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