Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
