If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize