you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize