somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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