im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
