Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
