At least make sure they are 18
Why
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Dicks are not precious.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
