She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
