I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize