i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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