Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
