I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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