Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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