go do what you do best...puke behind churches
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
