What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize