Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
