It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize