bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
bring money and cleavage
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
