do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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