If i come over, it means nothing
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
