TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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