So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
