i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize