and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
