it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Randomize
