you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize