looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Randomize