look no pants
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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