im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Dignity is for republicans.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
