for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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