I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
