are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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